“7 (plus a pro-habit) Tiny Everyday Habits that have a Powerful Impact on our Lives Other than the random element of luck, what differentiates successful people from the rest are their Habits. They cultivate certain habits which contribute to their happier and healthy life. Learning these habits and how to use them in your life is rewarding. In this book, you will learn about simple yet impactful lifestyle habits that separate achievers from regular people. These tiny habits have a transformative effect on your physical and mental health, career, your relationships, and life.
REVIEW
Self-help books always have a special corner when I’m choosing books for my next read or to be added to my TBR. Especially when it is a book concerning habits then there is no looking at blurb I simply pick it up and start reading it.
This book ‘Tiny habits massive results ‘ by Jaishree Nenwani is the first by an Indian author that I picked up centred around habits. Habits truly define the person that we are. And they are also the things that make you stand apart from other around us. Leading a healthy and happy life is not just about food and exercise but also the habits that you’ve cultivated over a period of time.
When you meet someone and you get inspired make sure you also get to know what is that one thing that makes them stand apart which would ultimately be the habits that form their lifestyle. Make sure to see if you can incorporate them into yours.
The author gives you tips on how to include them and make them part of your routine. These tips are simple ways to bring in a change to our lifestyle to lead a healthy and happy life. Though they might be tiny habits but the changes they bring in is massive.
Processing grief was a major problem that I was facing a year back. But I attribute the small changes that I brought in which helped me manage the grief processing. If you are someone who is still yet to dive into the inclusion of new habits in your routine, do not worry. Jaishree will handhold you with starting to explain what is a habit, why is it important to develop them, how to form one and the seven habits that are going to have a great impact on your life. As a pro tip she gives you an extra edge with a tip that’s actually the cherry on top for which you will have to pick the book.
Explaining the seven habits the author not only let’s you know how important it is to include that habit but also ways on how you can make it part of your regular routine so that you don’t miss doing it each day. I loved how she chose to keep it simple by citing instances from her life which would make it more relatable when you read through the book.
Overall, if you are a beginner or a pro looking at making changes in life by bringing in new habits I’d suggest this book will be your guide to discover a new you.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Jaishree is a millennial blogger curating inspired wisdom that guides people to go deep and make a shift in their thoughts. She is passionate about journaling and loves to share wisdom and journaling tools that invoke deeper authenticity and Personal transformation. On her blog (https://getsethappy.com) she writes about Self-improvement, Personal growth and ways to become happier in your life.
The book released in 1987 since then its been one of the best sellers in Personal Development. The book helped transform people around the world in terms of their life and work.
All of us want to reach our destination and achieve our goals. As the title suggests why wouldn’t one want to learn the habits of effective people. Since we all want to achieve the goals one way to success would be to take note of habits that would help you through the journey.So putting more in terms of productivity and efficiency will help us reach there.
But hands down the book does end up teaching you a lot more than the seven habits. Called the treasure trove of productivity and the wisdom that helps you reach achievement if you still haven’t found the treasure box, its just right there waiting for you to open the chest.
There are three constants in life… change, choice and principles. – Stephen Covey
Covey’s belief is that the way we see the entire world is through our perception. SO if we want to bring about a change in any situation we would first need to bring in the change in us. And when we say the change in us it would also mean the change in the way we perceive things.
Long long ago the success foundation was laid on character ethic which would be courage , justice, patience, integrity, modesty. But as time passed around in 1920s success moved to personality ethic which included public image, behavior and attitude.
Now all people want is faster solutions and way up the ladder. The moment they see someone or team or an organization succeed they jump with questions on how to and gaining knowledge on the techniques. But these short term solutions will not address the underlying solution but will manage to help you achieve success in short time.
Covey writes,”The way we see the problem is the problem,” We as humans must undergo what is called the paradigm shifts to go deep and change the fundamentals rather than just go about on changing the behavior and attitude on the outside just to achieve.
Now that is where Covey comes up with the seven habits that can help you out.
Habits 1,2,3 help to move from dependence to independent.Self-mastery Habits 4,5,6 help move from independence to interdependence that’s where you focus on teamwork, collaborating and communicating. Habit 7 helps on continuous growth and improvement and embodies the other habits.
Habit 1 Be proactive
Our ability to examine the character and decide how to view the self in situations and control our effectiveness is what makes us stand apart from the other beings. So to be effective one needs to be proactive.
Reactive people believe world is happening to them. They feel victimized and lose control. They think the problem is out which rightly points out that their thought is the actual problem.
However on the other hand the proactive people understand they responsibility which drills down to how you would respond to the situation.
Challenge yourself to test the principle of proactivity by doing the following: 1. Start replacing reactive language with proactive language. Reactive = “He makes me so mad.” Proactive = “I control my own feelings.” 2. Convert reactive tasks into proactive ones.
HAbit 2 Begin with the end in mind
Picture your destination in mind.Use your imaginative power to visualize what you want to see yourself become and use the conscience to plan what values will guide you.
We find it easy to make ourselves busy. Let it be working hard to achieve promotion, high pay. We don’t pause to evaluate if this is what we really want that keeps us busy.
So habit 2 will make sure we start with the end in mind so that we know the steps we take are in the right path leading to the clear destination.
Habit 3 Put First Things First
Effective management means we put first things first. The discipline that helps you prioritize what is more important than what is more urgent is what matters. Habit three helps you to go after the goals set by habit two and execute them on order of priority and moment basis.
So in a disciplined manner to stay focused on the journey we need to have the willpower do something when you actually don’t want to. We need to act according to the values rather than giving in to desires.
“Think effectiveness with people and efficiency with things.” -Stephen Covey
Habit 4 Think Win win
For effective interdependent relationship we must be sure to create win-win relationship which mutually benefit and satisfy the participants.
Covey explains that there are six paradigms of human interaction: 1. Win-Win: A situation where both people win wherein the solution and argument is beneficial and satisfactory. 2. Win-Lose: This is prone to use position,power and personality to get things done. Rather its “If I win, you lose.” 3. Lose-Win:These people are quick to please and gain strength from popularity or acceptance something like “I lose, you win.” 4. Lose-Lose: This would be a combination of two people who are win -lose where they’re both ego invested, stubborn and end up losing. 5. Win: These people get what they wish for and do not necessarily want the other to lose which would mean irrelevant to them. 6. Win-Win or No Deal: If you can’t reach an agreement that is mutually beneficial, there is no deal.
The safe and best option is to create a win-win situation. In win-lose and lose-win one person gets what they want, but thats only for the moment and will definitely make an impact in the relationship moving forward. As a backup it is important we use win-win or no deal. The no deal leaves your mind free cause you needn’t manipulate people or make changes in your agenda.
“To go for Win-Win, you not only have to be nice, you have to be courageous.” -Stephen Covey
Habit 5. Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood
Much before offering advice or suggestions or to interact with the other person we must understand them in a deep manner and their perceptions through the way of empathic listening. Seeking to understand and to be understood first requires learning to listen. We all know the below split up suggested by communication experts.
10% of our communication is represented by our words 30% is represented by our sounds 60% is represented by our body language
The second part of Habit 5 is ” … then to be understood.” This is equally critical in achieving Win-Win solutions.
Habit 6. Synergize
We have an opportunity to create a synergy by not only understanding but also valuing the differences in the other perspective.Through being open and creative we would be able to uncover new possibilities by the synergy created.
The combination of the rest of the habits actually prepares you for habit 6.
There are 4 dimensions of nature that needs to be exercised and balanced on a regular basis.
PHYSICAL: Exercising the body to increase capacity to work and adapt. Eat well, exercise ,rest and relax. Focusing on this dimension helps develop muscles of being proactive.
SPIRITUAL: Reinforcing commitment to our value and to provide leadership to the life is the goal of spiritual dimension renewal. Meditation on a daily basis, immersing in music or literature, communicating with nature are ways to practice this renewal. This helps to practice habit 2 where we revise and commit ourselves to values on a continued basis so we begin with the end in mind.
Mental Dimension: Expanding mind is goal of renewing mental dimension.Reading a good book, recording the experiences in journal and watch programs which enrich mind and life. This helps in practicing habit 3 to maximize the use of resource and time by effectively managing ourselves.
Social/Emotional Dimension: Social or emotional dimension renewal is to have the goal of developing meaningful relationships. Deeply understanding people, making contributions which help in improving other lives, practice and maintain abundance mentality and help others find success helps renew this dimension.
Social and emotional dimension renewal helps to make us practice 4,5,6 and by recognizing existence of win-win solutions, understanding others and finding new alternatives through synergy.
Opening new possibilities and alternatives is possible through synergy.As a group you can collectively shunt the old scripts and write new ones.
For example, if you plant two plants close together, their roots will co-mingle and improve the quality of the soil, so that both plants will grow better than they would on their own.
Valuing the differences in terms of mental, psychological and emotional differences is the real essence of synergy.
Habit 7. Sharpen the Saw
Devoting time to renew ourselves physically, spiritually,mentally and socially will make us effective. Continuous renewal will increase the ability to practice habits on increase that is synergistic.
Taking the time for renewal and sharpening the saw is what habit 7 is focused on. It surrounds the other habits by making sure each of the one is possible by enhancing ourselves which is the greatest asset.
The real beauty of the 7 Habits is that improvement in one habit synergistically increases our ability to improve the rest.
A classic book that analyses the life of successful men . The secret to their success and these are men from all walks of life.
So if you’re looking to learn the secrets to wealth, this book is unquestionably the best choice.
The book was first published in 1937 and has sold over 70 million copies.
The first word in the title Think shows you that the main thing to focus on is the mindset.
The book gives in detail the thirteen steps to building wealth. These are the thirteen steps to riches.
““The starting point of all achievement is DESIRE. Keep this constantly in mind. Weak desire brings weak results, just as a small fire makes a small amount of heat.” – Napoleon Hill
Having a burning desire
The most critical word here to note is burning. A lukewarm or a normal temperature desire will not have an effect. As life goes on, notice what lights you up well enough that prepares you to commit accomplishing that no matter what.
A burning desire is the actually the one which ignites the beginning of your dream.
Organized plan and refining it
“A quitter never wins – and – a winner never quits.” – Napoleon Hill
When you dream of something which isn’t followed by a plan, it’s just a mere wish. It’s always good to think about the dream that gives you happy memories but keep in mind that getting to make it reality which actually putting up a plan will zero your chances.
A dream requires more than a desire. You need to take right actions. And to know the right times to take the right actions you need to have a recognised plan. The organized plan will become your roadmap to success.
Adapting and preparing for adversity
Problems crop up even with the best plans in hand. This is an inevitable part of human life but what you need to focus on is how to handle teh adversity.
The book highlights how all successful people handled adversity and the one important thing they all did. It is to see the good in every problem.
“Every adversity has within it the seed of an equal or greater opportunity.”
Finding the good in whatever situation it may be no matter how worse it is , was the one most successful people practiced. This is one crucial step for you to succeed.
Great team
You can never accumulate great wealth single handedly. You need the help of others. Just surround yourself with good people.
You as a person single handedly cannot assume and do everything on your own nor you are aware of all what you should be doing. You need a team to create your dream to reality.
Fear of criticism
As per Napoleon there are six fears which stop people attaining riches.
The fear of poverty
The fear of criticism
The fear of ill health
The fear of loss of love of someone
The fear of old age
The fear of death
The fear of criticism in the above is considered the most powerful and certainly one that affects us the most.
It makes you lose hope and feel dejected which is why most people feel very uncomfortable to receive it.
Published in 2006, translated into 44 languages worldwide and sold over 20 million copies, the Secret by Rhonda Byrne should definitely be one of the books that you should read before turning 30.
The book garners the secret to achieve what you want. The book lets you know in detail what you need to wish for or how in order to achieve it.
The premises of the law of attraction is what the book clearly outlays. It goes like,
Basically, the law of attraction tells us whatever we will believe, we will manifest. If we believe we are deserving of great love, then we will manifest it. If we believe we are going to be poor, we’re going to stay poor. If we believe we don’t deserve something, it’s not going to come to us. Sounds pretty amazing, right?
Makes it very simple to understand that what you think becomes the reality . So the thoughts you have deep down will have a direct impact on what you manifest
Let me quickly take you through the lessons from this book.
The law of attraction
“The law of attraction is the greatest and most infallible law upon which the entire system of creation depends.”
What you think and what you focus attracts things that you want in life just similar to how gravity pulls things down.
Thinking is the starting point
Emotions, actions, habits, career, beliefs, speech, values whatever we give out is based on what we think.
What you see around yourself today was someone else’s thought in the past that was brought to reality.
Now that understanding that the way you think will be the starting point, if there is a change that you want you know where to start making it.
The present circumstance is a result of your past thoughts so the future you want to see will depend on what your thoughts are today.
You attract what you focus on
Whatever you focus on is what you will attract.
Say if you focus on promotion and vacation you get it. On the other hand if you focus on what you don’t want, ( debts) you get that too.
Most people are thinking about what they don’t want, and they’re wondering why it shows up over and over again.”
People predominantly focus on what they don’t want and without knowing since they focus a lot on it, they tend to attract it.
So if you want something, make it happen in your thoughts, think all the time about it and make sure you focus and also put in your energy into it.
Negative word attraction
The universe doesn’t understand negative words.
Say no, don’t, doesn’t and not. So when you put that in your thought your actually attracting it from the universe.
I don’t want to be poor= I want to be poor
I don’t want to fail = I want to fail
So make sure you think about only what you want. So instead of putting it as I don’t want to fail. Think of it as I will be successful or even better would be that I am successful.
Listen to your feelings
Paying close attention to feelings lets you understand your thoughts. This is what the Secret teaches you.
Let’s take an example of how we feel now?
Happy feeling= happy thoughts
Dejected feelings= dejected thoughts
Jealous feelings= jealous thoughts
The secret tells you to shift focus on what you want when you feel sad, angry or dejected. This will be the solution to your problem, shifting focus from what you don’t want to what you want.
The sooner you switch to positive focus, the more positive your thoughts will be and thereby will be attracting the same from universe.
Three step to success: ask, believe and receive
Ask : Whatever you desire or want to ask, make sure you go down to be specific.
Say instead of saying I want to be successful say I want to become successful in my new venture by two months.
And now if that doesn’t happen in two months you cannot exclaim this approach failed. Let’s look into step two.
Believe : you will attract only what you believe in.
Let’s consider the example from above where you mentioned you want to be successful in your new venture, but somewhere down inside you are still doubtful if you will make it, makes its clear that you don’t believe in what you want.
So first you need to believe that what you wish for is attainable. Only then the universe would be convinced.
So becoming successful in your new venture is something that you are doubtful of in two months, how can the universe be convinced? Sounds legit ?
Receive: So once you start believing pretend that you’ve attained it and start living with it.
This will tube you into the right frequency and also tune your energy completely to receive it.
So if you want to be a designer, keep telling yourself each that you’re a designer which will mould the behavior by creating your role and design with that mindset.
The behavior of having received it, will make you commit actions which help in achieving that goal.
Being grateful
“The power of gratitude stands above everything else. If you only do one thing with the knowledge of the Secret use gratitude until it becomes your way of life.”
The biggest secret is to be grateful for what you already have in life and to be thankful for what you want to receive in future.
This gives a good vibe and also a lot of positive thoughts. Being grateful helps in shifting focus from what you don’t have to what you have.
“Each morning before you get out of bed, make it a habit to feel the feelings of gratitude in advance for the great day ahead, as though it is done.”
I could continue to keep on writing about this book but I’d really love if you could grab a copy of this life changer and read the remaining secrets.
I’m still dumbstruck that books published long long ago still hold good when it comes to giving us life lessons. Published in a period where there was not much importance to trends and fads these books convey the lessons of leading life in a fulfilling manner.
As a man thinketh was published in 1902 by James Allen. Self-help books are usually deemed very long but on the contrary this book gives you the lessons in almost an hour.
Known as one of the self-help classics the books is centred predominantly on the theme that harnessing the power of thoughts helps you to master life. Did you know that James Allen was a pioneer in the self-help movement?
You become what you think
The person who you are now, us because of the thoughts that you previously had or having now. If you’d want to incorporate a change start changing the thoughts .
The hidden seeds of thoughts give rise to all actions of a person.
Good thoughts and results can never produce bad results; bad thoughts and actions can never produce good results.
Divine perfection is achieved with choosing and applying good thoughts. But on the other side, choosing and applying wrong thoughts can make him stoop below the level of beast.
If it is time to weed out bad thoughts it is today. Choose this day to not accept the negative thoughts and fight back. To take control of life, take control of your mind.
Mind is like a garden
The mind is a garden thay can be cultivated in a wise manner or if let loose can grow wild. It is upto you to sow the seeds of beautiful flowers, if not you will see useless weeds.
Think of you as the gardener who pulls out unnecessary weeds and chooses the right seed to sow, nurture and yield beautiful flowers. Choosing to showcase your mind with beautiful flowers or useless weeds depends upon your thoughts.
Life is beautiful when you make the right choices if not the mind is consumed by useless weeds.
“A man’s mind may be likened to a garden, which may be intelligently cultivated or allowed to run wild.”
The beautiful thoughts can be a skill, or a life changing decision so start making the right choices.
Thoughts can not only mentally affect you, it can physically too
Your thoughts which include the how and what can influence not only your mental health but also the body physically.
Being healthy is not only about the body, it also includes the mind. So people who constantly fear of contracting diseases are often the ones who suffer.
The body is the mind’s servant so it choses to obey the signals it receives.
Change of diet will not help a man who will not change his thoughts.
The way of thinking also affects the way people age. People in nineties are bright and always smiling but whereas the one’s in mid thirty to forties are still seen with inharmonious contours.
Anxiety quickly demoralizes the whole body, and lays it open to the, entrance of disease.
What you think can have an impact on your sleep cycle, heart rate and chronic illness. You can think your way to wrinkly skin. Whereas happy and cheerful thoughts can make you beam with youthfulness.
You being shaped doesn’t rely on your circumstances
Just because you’re from a different background or an environment that is unsupportive doesn’t mean that you cannot get what you want. The outer world of circumstances shapes your inner world of thoughts so your circumstances don’t stand the chance to decide what you cannot achieve.
Men are anxious to improve their circumstances, but are unwilling to improve themselves; they, therefore, remain bound
You are free to choose the way to respond to any circumstance. And do you know what’s the best way? To focus the area where you have control. You win life if you choose to focus on areas which have your control and ways to improvise.
Thoughts and actions go hand in hand
Most self-help preachers say that you can achieve if you believe in something. Known as the law of attraction.
However, James on the other hand says that the thoughts on your mind will only be the starting point. If the thoughts are not supported by right actions, you can never achieve what you wished for.
Stepping out, taking action and achieving what you want gets you to your dream. Just sitting and waiting for it to come to you will do no good.
Not what he wishes and prays for does a man get, but what he justly earns. His wishes and prayers are only gratified and answered when they harmonize with his thoughts and actions. Sign up
Most often you can compare the relationship with books to the relationship you have with people. Two parts of the relationship one of which is you and the other is outside you that is either the book or the people. The timing when you read is also important in the relationship with the book. It helps you understand what problems you are looking to solve, what is the perspective gained and what you yearn from the validation.
Mark Manson’s bright orange book and one of the best sellers ‘The subtle art of not giving a fu*k’ can never be missed from sight. Your neighbour or a co-traveller or a colleague at work are sure to have seen reading this book.
The title of the book sure did make a lot of heads turn and eyeballs rolling. I can confidently say that this is one of the best influential books till date and almost everyone who would have read the book will agree with me in unison.
The outcome of reading the book will help in making you understand a bit more about the way you process things and your priorities. It helps in confidently letting you draw a line between what is actually important and what is not.
People misplace values a lot more often and give importance to things that don’t hold much value and what happens is that they miss out on things that really matters to them. They live a life that is not very fulfilling.Have you realized this at any point of time in your life? Or if you feel you are doing this, you should definitely be picking this book up.
Not having the “best” is the secret to fulfilling life
People are made to believe that they live life king size or lead a good life when they have the nest in everything. This is the main reason or the factor that misleads people to run behind material happiness. The best job, the best property, find the right match as spouse, car and what not. Running behind these people fail to enjoy little things and don’t lead a fulfilling life. These are superficial and make you believe that you’re leading a great life, but they can get you depressed during your journey of want.
Pick your battles wisely. Invest your energy where it matters.
“Maturity is what happens when one learns to only give a fck about what’s truly fck-worthy.”
You need to invest your time and energy on things which really matter to you. Those which bring you real happiness and play a part in you leading a meaningful life. You cannot go behind everything you see. When you learn to distinguish what really matters to you that is when you become matured.
Failure is a part of life. Failure is how you learn and grow.
“If you take an example of a toddler trying to learn to walk, he/she will fall down and hurt themself hundreds of times. But you should also realise that the kid at no one point will have a thought of agreeing to the fact that this isn’t my cup of it, since I’m not good at it.
You can’t ever really “find yourself” because who you are willing constantly change, and that’s a good thing.
Remaining humble in giving out opinions or judgements and willingness to accept the differences in people is being made to force upon you when you really don’t know who you are, Let it be that way. Let each day be a learning to discovering new things about you. This is make you strive to find more about you.
Suffering is essential to growth
“We suffer for the simple reason that suffering is biologically useful. It is nature’s preferred agent for inspiring change”.
Mark says that suffering is inevitable and knowing that it plays a major role in growth is actually better. Discomfort, suffering and pain will eventually lead you to grow.
Only when there is pain you will seek a change that will lead to growth.
Pain will inspire change because it brings discomfort, and when you feel uncomfortable, you’ll seek comfort, so, ultimately, you are seeking change.
Next time when you feel painful, don’t see it as a hindrance and stay away from it. Feel it, accept it and understand there is a reason that is valid for you to experience it. The more you get used to, the more comfortable and happy you will be for its presence.
Stop searching for happiness and understand that it is already there
People are always on the quest for happiness. It is right there sitting in front of you and can be seen through your eyes, instead we look all around for it failing to realize its existence.
Embrace happiness that is present and start enjoying life leaving the quest to search for something that is not visible to you.
You are individually responsible for all your life events, be it whatever circumstances.
You don’t always have the control on what happens to you, but you do have on how to interpret and how to react or respond. It doesn’t matter if you life it or no you play a major role in what happens within you and to you.
Accepting responsibility for your own problems will be first step to solve them.
You exercise more power in life when you take up more responsibility or accept. The choices you make in the present results in responsibilities. Real learning and improvement in life happens only when we take take up being responsible for our problems.
As per Wikipedia, a habit is a routine behavior that is repeated on a regular basis. It also tends to happen subconsciously.
Habits are actions we do on a daily basis. In a nutshell our entire life is the total addition of all the habits we have.
Our success, happiness, being in shape it all dives down to our habits. So what we repeatedly do actually becomes the person we are, the personality we portray and the things we believe in.
Atomic habits is one book that made me introspect my habits or what I do on a daily basis. A deeper analysis of what I do on a daily basis made me think if it has to be continued or this can be stopped.
Here are my takeaways from this wonderful book.
Recognizing habits
A deeper introspection of the habits that we do on a daily basis will reveal what we are. Almost our entire day is a complete timetable of our habits. We don’t think of this because we do this autonomously. Revisiting the habits and classifying them into good, bad and something in between will help you decide if you should continue doing it. When you don’t do this you continue doing things on a routine which you actually shouldn’t.
Habit cycle
Did you know that habits have a cycle? Yes something like a life cycle we say for a material or a living thing. What we do on a routine basis in terms of behavior is a habit. But when you break it down you get to know the elements.
Cue
Craving
Response
Reward
This is the habit loop. A simple exercise would be to sit down and break your habit and put them in the above loop. Understand what is the cue that made you start this habit, what is the craving that the cue gives you, what is the response you give to the craving and what reward you get after the response from you.
Good and bad habits
Managing your habits by identifying them as good or bad is one of the most important steps. There is a process to create a good habit and the inversion of which helps to break a bad habit. The book gives a working framework of how this can be done in a simplified way.
Laws of behavior change by James Clear hells you foster good habits and transform bad habits to good.
Make it obvious.
Make it attractive.
Make it easy
Make it satisfying
Following this law makes your introspection very easy. For a good habit make sure your response is in a rewarding way. In the same way to break a bad habit do the inverse.
Make it invisible.
Make it unattractive.
Make it difficult.
Make it unsatisfying.
Doesn’t all this make so much sense? Making your bad habit unattractive and difficult should make sure you stop doing it.
Starting small
You need not make a dramatic shift to make a change. As the book suggests, taking a small step as much as 1%, makes an effective progress. Starting on small and Incrementing the effort on a day to day basis can help in achieving the goal. So if you do 1% better each day for over a year, you’d be 37 times better when the period completes. Don’t you agree that’s quite a remarkable improvement. Since we are the result of our habits, if we keep them small, we get what we repeat and in the long run ne much better at it. .
Not missing twice
If we miss it once in a while that should count to be fine but never to miss twice. Realising that you missed goal or didn’t do something that was set up as a good habit, do it better when you do it at next time. .
I want it and it means now
We all love rewards and especially when we get it in no time. Most people don’t like to wait for long term rewards. So choose habits that help you feel instantly happy. We need to go on a diet for a longer period to reap the reward but a tiny chocolate instantly uplifts you. So get a cookbook that helps making tasty healthy choices. Save money you kept for alcohol in case you want to quit into the vacation funding.
Triggering
The brain is lazy and absolutely loves to do what makes it more comfortable. So it is upto us to make it use the strategy for the good habits.
Say we want to learn a language or an instrument keep the book or the instrument at a place where it’s easily reachable, than putting it away from your view. Best place would be to put besides the remote or phone.
Carrot stick approach
As already mentioned we love getting rewarded. The brain reacts favourably when we await a reward. The brain releases dopamine when we do something that gives a pleasant feeling. So in expecting this the brain triggers the action. So think of the reward next time you include a new good habit.
For the mind disturbed, the still beauty of dawn is nature’s finest balm.”
– Edwin Way Teale
There are a number of reasons for the human mind to be disturbed. It could be stress, peer pressure, the family’s financial state , problems in relationship or even something that involves kids or even making kids. So the list goes on but the only end result would be a disturbed mind.
The loss of a loved one is definitely a permanent scar that will keep ringing in the mind. No matter how hard you try it’s like the waves that keep hitting the shore. A minute thing be it physical or an emotional occurrence that brings a quick memory flash. It takes time to heal and get back. Days, months or even years.
“When we lose someone we must not learn to live without them, but to learn to live with the love they left behind.”
Harini had been trying hard to believe that the hands that she held while growing up is now no more. Brothers and sisters are as close and hands and feet. And to believe that it is gone too soon was not something that happens overnight.
She wanted a change to move on. That is when Prashanth, her husband decides to sign her up for fair Anita travel program.
Fair Anita is asocial enterprise that supports women artisans from around the world. Most of these artisans are victims are domestic violence and support their livelihood with income from making exquisite handmade jewelry. Fair Anita has currently about 8000 women artisans who earn three times the minimum wage. This trade is the sustainable revenue opportunity for these women. Fair Anita was founded in 2009 by Joy McBrien in the light of supporting women and their dreams of economic independence.
Economic independence is of utmost importance to women in general I would say. Be it a normal or a strained relationship between man and woman, economic independence is something that I’d say is definitely a must for every woman. So if at all an untoward event occurs this give you the power to stand out instead of adjusting and tolerating abuse.
The travel program was unique that required women from around the world who would travel with the founder to meet the artisans. It required women to apply and then choose twelve people to accompany the founder. Harini wanted to go on this lone trip to regain what? Her wish to go beyond her comfort zone That is what the book is all about.
Like how she says in the prologue. ‘There are things we do with absolute clarity and things we do with absolute certainty’ . Harini here was certain about going on this journey but not clear not what would it yield. She had many questions on similar grounds piling up in mind looking for answers, which she wasn’t sure if the trip would hold answers. `
Beads that lead
The book has chapters which describes Harini’s journey of life that lead to reflection and self-discovery. A journey that sure did give her some friends for life, inspiration and answers to the ongoing questions in her mind.
The book begins where Harini boards the flight alongside women from different parts of the world boarding at the same time to meet and proceed with the journey of discovery.
Post her alone flying experience which brought back melancholic memories of the last time she had traveled , she finally landed in Lima , the capital of Peru to meet her fellow tribe.
Harini and the ten others stayed in Lima before they depart to Chimbote, a place where Fair Anita has it roots. Harini found her comfortable in the company of Mary Lind (ML) and Karin who made her tearful with their talks. And for the first time over a long period Harini wet her pillow with happy tears.
They reached Chimbote, the next day by bus from Lima. Chimbote is extremely poverty stricken and has striking similarity to a developing country that she could compare with some parts of India. She could definitely draw parallels to places where she has visited before and her homeland India on basis on social or physical structures and approach to family. Transport around the area had to be ensured to be safe for the group and it was taken care by Joy.
Every night these women get back to their base after dinner to have a reflection activity with their buddies who discuss their highs and lows of the day. I loved the fact that the activity was for intent of creating a space for safer conversations.
They were welcomed with colors all over and the houses around didn’t seem to reflect the conditions of people inside is what we’re told. Harini came across people from different situations that made her go into deeper thoughts.
She came across an old man who was left abandoned by his family after his paralysis and girl children who were left abandoned by the father and are now under the care of grandfather and had to share a bed because of poverty. The descriptions were so very painful for me to continue beyond that I had to take a break to get back to my senses.
Peru in general has varying topographies and is more prone to natural disasters which make the already worse conditions to live even bad. Th condition of people trying to get back to life post a disaster is also quite difficult in addition to their already existing woes.
Anita goes round their neighbourhood on a day to basis to identify the needs of the people and ways to help them out.
Harini also got to know about her tribe well and these women who would be her companions even beyond this trip. Events from one of her day also involved the group spending time to help around with houses to be build, conducting art classes for kids.
How does it feel to know that you indirectly sponsored to build someone a house and at the same time you also get to spend time physically to help setting it. Satisfactory? I’d say even beyond that for people like us who are always stuck to out digital treasure chest(I mean the laptop).
We’re also given accounts of the best place for Churros and lots of others places to visit like the beaches and temples. So for the travel buffs, you could make note of these.
The trip happened before the world reeled into the pandemic waves. Thankful that if not , we wouldn’t have got to read this book. The book also tells inspirational stories of some artisans which makes you feel powered and sad at the same time. These stories come out in the form of interviews of the artisans that the tribe did.
The tribe modelling for the artisans with some of their best collections was another beautiful moment that I loved reading over and over again.
AS they depart back to where they came from the author wished for a cheerful goodbye but turned out being tense situation. I leave it to you to go read what actually happened when they were departing.
Overall it also comes to light that gender equality is not something that is as simple as we say it. The author also goes by the same thoughts. The trip enlightened a lot of experiences in terms of culture and learning.Harini also emphasizes that with only her thinking on gender equality will not have much impact in the vast ocean of thinking of human race. But instead of staying idle an action speaks a lot. Though she might be a drop, it makes an ocean only when there are countless drops.
So it is equally important to raise responsible men when we say raise a responsible girl child.
Harini’s writings are clear , crisp and no beating around the bush.Her account of events make you visualize them without any inhibition. The description of the topographies, the physical state of people living in Chimbote was brought live to me through her writing.
I really loved the way how each chapter began with a quote that had some relation with what the chapter would be about.
I’d like to thank the author, for giving me this opportunity on her debut book. I’m really glad and honored at the same time to let know I echo the same thoughts on gender inequality and I’m sure most women could relate to. You could count me in as another drop into this mighty ocean.
Fiction and self-help are two of my favourite genres of books. I really don’t know the time ticking when I settle down in my reading corner with books in any one of these genres.
What I look for in self-help books is strategies, lessons, case studies which tell you what to and what not to do.
When I came to know that this book has both self-help and fiction entwined I knew I definitely had to pick it up.
What I could also relate is that the book is set in modern period and so is something everyone of us millenials could resonate to.
It takes a lot of time for us to understand ourselves in a better way. The process of understanding oneself, about what we can and what we cannot, how we can and when we can is called self-discovery. Not everyone of us do this at the same time. Time plays an important role in making us realise this. This book embarks you on Jasmine’s journey of self-discovery.
The picturesque views of Himalayas while describing the journey to Kedarnath, would make you embark on a virtual journey. The pure relationship between the author and his spiritual teacher , their conversations mentioned provide a lot of learning.
Jasmine who was about to land into a professional career eventually landed into the world of modelling. So how does she handle it ? Does she succeed or fail ?
She had her parts of failures, jealousies, competition, wrong ways and finally rose above all of it. The author has a lot of learnings from life which he’s penned out beautifully through the story of Jasmine.
Everyone of us has a dream, a goal or an aim. We pursue our actions towards them . Did you know that the universe also has a major role in making our dreams come true?
A motivational book that helps you to stay focused and have a positive approach to rise above hurdles and accomplish the dream. The connection to the universe and it’s integral part in making our dreams come true also is a lesson to be learnt.
I love the writing style of the author which he serves to keep it lucid and brief. Overall a good guide for self-motivation and self-discovery.
The QR code scanning of certain chapters, through e-micro-learning is a completely different experience which is suggest all book lovers and people who are digital fan boys must check out.
Following our passion by overcoming hurdles should definitely be made a mandatory life skill to be possessed.
About the author
Sanjay is an entrepreneur and an ex-banker, an alumnus of IIM Bangalore and a Chartered Accountant. During his successful career, Sanjay has been integrating the essence of a parallel spiritual journey with his material pursuits. He has now set out to share the ways and means of seamlessly traversing through the material and spiritual world. Thereby, enriching each journey.
Click on the book cover below to purchase this motivational guide .
Integrated with hybrid multimedia learning tools, Jasmine Builds on Shifting Sands is a unique self-help fiction offering. Its captivating narrative ties two seemingly distinct tales in an intertwined journey that explores the manifestation of dreams. At the center of the book is Jasmine’s journey of making it as a successful model in the cut-throat world of fashion. Her tale of victory and failure is enveloped within the master narrative of Sanjay, an erudite knowledge-seeker who meets his spiritual guru- Ma. Set between the esoter ic location of the Himalayas and the urban bustle of Mumbai, the book offers an enhanced learning experience which is further amplified through the embedded microlearning content that is interspersed throughout the text, making for a truly immersive experience.
MY REVIEW
Jasmine builds on shifting sands
Fiction and self-help are two of my favourite genres of books. I really don’t know the time ticking when I settle down in my reading corner with books in any one of these genres.
As much as I enjoy fiction, I also enjoy reading self-help books and try implementing principles which suit my way of life. That’s what they’re written for right?
What I look for in self-help books is strategies, lessons, case studies which tell you what to and what not to do. They should make you feel that you could try attempting to implement lessons learned. Examples which state what went wrong and how could that have been handled to make it successful are stuffs which anyone would basically look for in self-help books.
When I came to know that this book has both self-help and fiction entwined I knew I definitely had to pick it up.
What I could also relate is that the book is set in modern period and so is something everyone of us millenials could resonate to.
It takes a lot of time for us to understand ourselves in a better way. Not knowing about ourselves and instead looking out for others to accept us is something that is not plausible. The process of understanding oneself, about what we can and what we cannot, how we can and when we can is called self-discovery. Not everyone of us do this at the same time. For some of us this process happens early and for some later on. This book embarks you on Jasmine’s journey of self-discovery.
The Prologue and the Epilogue add value by providing a powerful context arising from the author’s own personal experience.
The realistic description of the travel to Kedarnath, the picturesque views of Himalaya would make you embark on a virtual journey. The divine relationship between the author and his spiritual guru , their conversations mentioned provide a lot of spiritual learning.
Jasmine who was about to land into a professional career life eventually landed into the world of fashion. Now that is two extreme opposite fields. So how does she handle it ? Does she succeed or fail ? Is she happy or keeps brooding ?
The field that she landed was something completely new to her. She had her parts of failures, jealousies, competition, wrong ways and finally rose above all of it. The author has a lot of learnings from life which he’s penned out beautifully through the story of Jasmine.
Everyone of us has a dream, a goal or an aim. We pursue our actions towards them . We chart out a goal plan to achieve the results. Did you know that the universe also has a major role in making our dreams come true? Now that is what the author tries to convey.
A motivational book that helps you to stay focused and have a positive approach to rise above hurdles and accomplish the dream. The connection to the universe and it’s integral part in making our dreams come true also is a lesson to be learnt.
I love the writing style of the author which he serves to keep it simple and crisp. No beating around the bush or extravagant descriptions. Overall a good one for self-motivation and self-discovery.
About the author :
Sanjay is an entrepreneur and an ex-banker, an alumnus of IIM Bangalore and a Chartered Accountant. During his successful career, Sanjay has been integrating the essence of a parallel spiritual journey with his material pursuits. He has now set out to share the ways and means of seamlessly traversing through the material and spiritual world. Thereby, enriching each journey.
Click below on the thumbnail to buy yourself a copy.
That Madras Mom 