#BlogchatterA2Z D what to and what not to teach

We’re into the fourth alphabet D for which is like to mention qualities like dedicated, dependable, determined, decisive, delightful and a dreamer to be taught and practiced.

What to teach

Dedicated – Being dedicated would mean complete involvement in an action. To succeed in any task the first and foremost thing would be the dedication. The willingness that comes from within to spend the time and energy into something is what is termed dedication.

Dependable – Being dependable is being a person on whom we can be sure of or be confident of. This makes you a person on whom we could count on or rely upon. That level of confidence that forms a personality trait is being dependable.

Determined – Being determined is having a strong feeling to complete or succeed in a task. It is a feeling that will not allow anyone or anything to stop you from doing it. The firmness in resolution gives you that drive towards completion.

Decisive – Being decisive would mean the ability to decide and come to a conclusion. It is based on this trait you continue to accomplish the plan to proceed with the task. It doesn’t mean that you decide things in a hurry. It means you have enough knowledge on what you decide to proceed further on.

Delightful – This would mean becoming a liking for all. A character that would be loved and greatly appreciated and look forward to. It is that when someone describes you as delightful it means you bring in happiness or joy to the surroundings.

Dreamer – Being a dreamer would deem you a person who always imagines things you would like to happen but is impractical. But in my point of view if your aren’t a dreamer, you wouldn’t be a doer. It is dreams that often give you suggestions or solutions to existing problems in life.

What not to teach

Deceptive – Being deceptive would mean giving a false impression. You would not want your kid to be a person who makes you believe that something that is not true. You see them building up excuses for their mistake however believable that might be, cut it out right away.

Dishonest – As we know this is a characteristic of a person who cannot be trusted. We obviously do not want our kids to be this way. Make them act fair right from the beginning.

Domineering – Domineering would mean gain control of the situation in an inappropriate way. People with this characteristic try to thrust what they decide without having empathy. They feel they decide everything and that’s the end of it.

Despondent– Being despondent is having a low feeling or losing hope . It’s something like losing confidence or getting into depression.

That’s it with D and see you next week for fresh start with what you should be teaching in E and what not to . Until then have a great weekend.

#BlogchatterA2Z C what to and what not to teach

The third alphabet usually taught as c for cat, cake or cup for the kid. For us we would teach them to be cheerful, compassionate, confident, courageous and charismatic. What should we not teach would be cunning, choosey and childish.

What to teach

Cheerful – Being cheerful would mean being chirpy energetic. Somebody who brings joy and happiness would always be welcomed to any surrounding or gathering. Such a person is always someone who everybody looks forward to .

Compassionate – Would mean someone who would empathize and be kind to others. A child should learn to think before they act and know the possibility if their actions would hurt someone. The child should be kind to all. A compassionate person is someone who could alleviate somebody else’s stress. If you want to lead a happy life or your child to lead a happy life teach them to be compassionate.

Confident – Being confident means being firm and absolutely right about what one wants to do. Being confident can make a kid sure of their abilities and their views and perceptions.

Courageous – Courage does not attribute only to physical bravery. It makes a person stand up against all odds without any fear. Nobody is born courageous it take practice.

Charismatic – A person who is charismatic helps others that feel the confidence in addition to the self. They bubble with confidence and that’s something that’s not egoistic.

What not to teach

Cunning – A person who is cunning is clever but usually unacceptable since the way of approach was dishonest. The person is very much capable of manipulating others thoughts to get what they want.

Choosey – A kid should be taught to accept whatever he /she gets and not be choosey for each and every thing offered. This in other words is easier if the kid is able to adapt well to what they are being offered.

Childish Being childish means immature and ignorant act. Crying to achieve what they want, blaming others are some of the actions a childish person does. We must teach them not to cry over small things.

So you now know what to and what not to teach in C. See you tomorrow for D.

#blogchatterA2Z Theme reveal . A to Z of what to and what not to teach toddlers

Teaching your toddler
Teaching your toddler

Bringing up a child involves a lot of effort not only from the parents but also the people whom the child interacts during early years.

I’m still in the phase of bringing up my toddler step by step but life did have other plans that destiny wants me to refine the tuning i did in bringing up baby number one. Yes I’m expecting baby number two in the next few days and I hope I get to complete this challenge as well.

Coming to what I was initially writing yes bringing up the toddler is not always an easy task that just requires you to read out from a manual and do as it says.

What works for someone might not work for you. But the qualities or traits you wish to imbibe in them can be done if bring practiced from the very beginning.

The same goes with my posts as well. I’m not going to be writing about how you bring up kids and what to do. Rather, I’d just list out the qualities or traits that we could wish to cultivate in them and if they do, you’d be satisfied and take a comfortable seat watching them grow up and handle the challenges and situations life throws at them.

I’d be writing about the qualities in each alphabet and their benefits on how it would help mould them.

Review of strong roots have no fear

BLURB:

This book provides you with a simple framework within which you can raise your little ones to grow into empowered thought leaders in our constantly evolving multicultural world. If we raise our children with a culturally aware mindset, we need not fear the future. To that end the book focuses on building mindset with practical tips to impart Handling Big Emotions, Raising Readers, Self-Moderation, Dealing with Bullying, Navigating Friendships, Balancing Technology, Building a Global Outlook through Multilingualism, Racial Equality and much more.What you find in this book -The confidence to be intuitive as a parent. Timeless strategies for a confident mindset An honest look into mindful living.A global outlook for your multicultural family.How to be culturally sensitive and rooted within self.

MY REVIEW:

How often we search for parenting books wherein we look for real life examples? How often do we know that the author puts in her own experiences where she faced failures? Most often when I keep browsing for books on parenting, I find only those which point out a scientific reason behind the reason of behavior of the child. I could not find one where I had examples of what each parent would face.

So when there was an opportunity to review this book. I immediately grabbed it. I’ve heard of reviews about the book and wanted to read it myself. Aditi has covered the need for real life examples which were most needed by parents to understand what they were going through.

Quite a few lines from the book really made it worthy enough to be noted and followed.

Children are blank pieces of colored paper that we create timeless art on.

So they are already human beings with being different individuals. So the thought here is, you can teach them, but the decision they make at a later point of time can not only be based on what they are taught but also what they experience over the time.

Then she talks about the ongoing debate, stay at home mom vs the working mom.

I loved what she mentioned, chose whatever you want, but that should make you happy. The moment you are with the child; you are the parent. So no matter what we chose to be, it should make you happy being a parent.

Finding your tribe was one other concept I liked. We need to surround ourselves with people who make us feel good, who know what we are going through, who can be our well-wisher, who show us the right path. Most of all we should offer to be someone else’s tribe as well.

Parents need to set examples of owning up to mistakes.

When they witness us accepting emotions and work towards improving response; They tend to imitate us. They might tease us but would also make them think.

Kids making sound decisions when not around parents is what matters. And that comes from us being with them even when we are not.

The above line what does it say? Doesn’t it give you much joy when you hear kids being praised for being brought up well. Does that feel like a good pat on the back saying we deserve it? It does make you feel happy when your kids stand out, knowing what is being done is wrong and they shouldn’t join hands. Standing out in such a case is not abnormal.

The book provides you with a number of strategies to make parenting mindful and enjoyable.

I would definitely recommend the book to my fellow mommy friends. I am more clearer on what I have been doing and planning on what I will be doing.

MY RATINGS:

Cover: 4.5/5

Title: 4.5/5

Writing and presentation: 4.5/5

Overall: 4.5/5

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:

Aditi Wardhan Singh is an authoritative voice on cultural sensitivity and empowerment. Featured on CBS and NBC, she is the founder of the RWC magazine encouraging other voices like hers to come forth to create unique resources for parents everywhere so children can be global thought leaders. In her spare time, she enjoys choreographing recitals, volunteering and having dance parties with her two charming kids. She also writes for various well-known publications like Huffington Post, Thrive Global, Richmond Family Magazine, and more. Visit her site RaisingWorldChildren.com.

Mother tongue – a must teach to your toddlers #superbloggerchallenge #instacuppa

The sudden burst of mother tongue related posts and videos doing round is not because of a campaign or a contest. February 21 is observed as International mother language day worldwide. If this is observed worldwide that shows the importance of mother tongue. This is observed to promote awareness of linguistic and cultural diversity. This also familiarizes or brings awareness of a concept called multilingualism.

Going to the history of when and how this came to existence, it was Bangladesh who came up with the initiative and was approved at the UNESCO in 1999.This has been observed since the year 2000. The utmost powerful tools of conserving and evolving our physical and insubstantial heritage are the languages we speak.

Necessity of teaching your child mother tongue

Mother tongue has a major role to play in the child’s overall development. If the foundation of learning the mother tongue is strong, it is easier for the child to learn other languages. When your child is given exposure to learn to develop skills in more than one language, the easier it is for them to learn how to use them effectively. This will not be the case with a child who knows only one language. Children when exposed to learn more languages are capable of processing information in different language thereby making them more flexible.

Learning the mother tongue also helps in developing better literacy in turn increasing the vocabulary of the child; thereby making it easier when the kid goes to kindergarten.

Learning the mother tongue helps the child to feel more connected with the roots and culture. That will not be the case with children who are brought up in a place where they do not have much exposure to their mother tongue. As a result, they feel left out when they are back to where they belong.

How do you teach mother tongue?

  • Start teaching mother tongue at home
  • Communicate to them in mother tongue
  • Grandparents are a great learning source to teach mother tongue
  • Gatherings of like-minded people, in this case people who have same mother tongue
  • Read books in mother tongue.

How did I incorporate mother tongue in my toddler’s vocabulary?

  • I always teach my daughter the name of an object in tamil(my mother tongue) and English. In that way she is able to identify the object in both languages.
  • I always insist she calls me Amma(mother in tamil) and not mummy or mom. Same goes with Appa(father). She is taught the various terms for relatives only in mother tongue tamil.
  • Though she enjoys watching rhymes in English, there are equally good rhymes available in tamil as well. So she is exposed to both cultures.
  • The people in the house converse with her in Tamil to which she responds back well and I can also see that since us the elders talk in mother tongue at home she has picked up words from conversations and is able to use them in situations as she needs.

So let us be strong in teaching our kids the mother tongue so that they do not forget their roots and also help in preserving the vast heritage.

This article is written as a part of SuperBloggerChallenge conducted by Healthwealthbridge.com , Allaboutthewoman.com https://allaboutthewoman.com/woman-health/ and powered by Instacuppa https://instacuppastore.com and should not be repurposed, republished or used otherwise. The content herein is owned by the blogger. SuperBloggerChallenge is not responsible for any infringement caused.”

Mother tongue – a must teach to your toddlers #superbloggerchallenge #instacuppa

The sudden burst of mother tongue related posts and videos doing round is not because of a campaign or a contest. February 21 is observed as International mother language day worldwide. If this is observed worldwide that shows the importance of mother tongue. This is observed to promote awareness of linguistic and cultural diversity. This also familiarizes or brings awareness of a concept called multilingualism.

Going to the history of when and how this came to existence, it was Bangladesh who came up with the initiative and was approved at the UNESCO in 1999.This has been observed since the year 2000. The utmost powerful tools of conserving and evolving our physical and insubstantial heritage are the languages we speak.

Necessity of teaching your child mother tongue

Mother tongue has a major role to play in the child’s overall development. If the foundation of learning the mother tongue is strong, it is easier for the child to learn other languages. When your child is given exposure to learn to develop skills in more than one language, the easier it is for them to learn how to use them effectively. This will not be the case with a child who knows only one language. Children when exposed to learn more languages are capable of processing information in different language thereby making them more flexible.

Learning the mother tongue also helps in developing better literacy in turn increasing the vocabulary of the child; thereby making it easier when the kid goes to kindergarten.

Learning the mother tongue helps the child to feel more connected with the roots and culture. That will not be the case with children who are brought up in a place where they do not have much exposure to their mother tongue. As a result, they feel left out when they are back to where they belong.

How do you teach mother tongue?

  • Start teaching mother tongue at home
  • Communicate to them in mother tongue
  • Grandparents are a great learning source to teach mother tongue
  • Gatherings of like-minded people, in this case people who have same mother tongue
  • Read books in mother tongue.

How did I incorporate mother tongue in my toddler’s vocabulary?

  • I always teach my daughter the name of an object in tamil(my mother tongue) and English. In that way she is able to identify the object in both languages.
  • I always insist she calls me Amma(mother in tamil) and not mummy or mom. Same goes with Appa(father). She is taught the various terms for relatives only in mother tongue tamil.
  • Though she enjoys watching rhymes in English, there are equally good rhymes available in tamil as well. So she is exposed to both cultures.
  • The people in the house converse with her in Tamil to which she responds back well and I can also see that since us the elders talk in mother tongue at home she has picked up words from conversations and is able to use them in situations as she needs.

So let us be strong in teaching our kids the mother tongue so that they do not forget their roots and also help in preserving the vast heritage.

This article is written as a part of SuperBloggerChallenge conducted by Healthwealthbridge.com , Allaboutthewoman.com and powered by Instacuppa and should not be repurposed, republished or used otherwise. The content herein is owned by the blogger. SuperBloggerChallenge is not responsible for any infringement caused.”

Parenting – Are you doing it the right way ?

Parenting:

The process of nurturing and supporting the overall development of a child which includes social, emotional, physical and intellectual. Most importantly, it does not stop with the biological relationship. In fact, it extends much more into the intricacies of each phase of human development.

Styles of parenting:

  • Instinctive parenting.
  • Attachment parenting.
  • Helicopter parenting.
  • Authoritative parenting.
  • Permissive parenting.

Instinctive Parenting:

This is the old school method that is being followed for ages. In most families, this is the type of parenting that can be witnessed. You trust your instincts and guide the child. Most probably, you bring up the child in a way that you were brought up by your parents or grandparents.

Attachment parenting:

Attachment parenting primarily is based on developing a strong emotional bond between parent-child. It is believed that strong attachment brings up a good emotional well-being and the child feels secure being brought up by that way. Parents who adopt this style usually are more responsive, I mean quicker to respond to the child’s needs, feelings so that the child is secure. These parents believe in natural birthing, family bed, no punishments and homeschooling.

Helicopter parenting:

This is when there is constant interaction more precisely interference with the child. Parents tend to hover like a helicopter. This type of parenting supposedly makes the child too very dependent on the parent even after they cross certain age.

Authoritative parenting:

This typically is, ‘I gave birth to you, you live on my property, so you follow my rules’ kind. Rules and guidelines are established for children to be followed. This parent is more nurturing and supportive if incase the child fails to meet expectations. Discipline according to then is being confident but not restrain, to nurture rather than reprove.

Permissive parenting

It’s a child’s choice is what the parenting is about. These parents have very few demands and rarely indulge in disciplining the child. More precise being lenient is the most important trait of the parent here. They try to be more a friend than being a parent to the child.

Good and Bad parenting:

Teaching your child, the moral of choosing what is right and wrong is the foundation of good parenting. You can refer more about this is my older article- Teaching your child good and bad choice. The key to good parenting is setting limits and being consistent. We must be firm and also be kind at the same time to make the child follow.

Anything that is negative to the above statements is termed bad parenting.

A series of action, not just one single act which can harm the child’s behavior and psychology is termed bad parenting. This is not always intentional, but this does not console you that the negative effects would lessen. This usually happens when people do not know enough or lack of the need to do it the right way. The hard thing to digest is some people are not aware of what is actually happening and some do not even care.

How do you identify bad parenting?

  1. Scolding the child frequently.
  2. Disciplining in front of other people. This includes grandparents as well.
  3. Constant comparison to other kids.
  4. No attachment or affection
  5. No rules
  6. Lack of support
  7. Advice always and no encouragement
  8. Not giving them choice
  9. Too much pampering
  10. Talking to them in a criticizing tone
  11. NO respect for child’s feeling
  12. Being overprotective of them
  13. Being too busy and not spending time
  14. Setting a bad example

Being a good parent

No parent is perfect. It’s just that we are all trying our best to become one and are still on the way and have a long way up.

Below cues can help you add more skills if you are already one or just the starting point for you to build up to become one.

Be the model. – Don’t keep telling them what to do; Show them how.

  1. Loving them- Show them love, you can be unconditional; there are no limits. Give them a lot of hugs, spend time, listen to them. Too much love doesn’t spoil them.
  2. Positive parenting – Give them a lot of positive vibes and bring them up in such environment. Do not talk about negative stuff.
  3. You’re the rescuer- Let them know you are always there for them and they can always walk up to you to feel safe.
  4. Communicating – This is the key. Talk to them freely, offer solutions, suggest options, give them choices. Listen to what they say to you. DO not out rightly reject immediately when they start.
  5. Reflecting- Most of us try to bring in the way we were brought up with minor changes. This is much like reflecting our childhood.
  6. No spanking- DO not spank your child at any cost. Especially not in front of others. This would make them lower their confidence.

We are unique in our own ways of bringing the child up. It’s just the above categories are grouping o similar behavior that is observed across the world.

Taking your toddler to a restaurant. What to and what not to ?

Toddler at restaurant

How many of you are excited about going to a restaurant with a toddler? Okay let me put it this way. How many of you plan your trip to the restaurant with your toddler? By planning I mean everything- food, clothing, toys, stroller and what not.

For many of us taking a toddler with the family to have a fine dining out is something that requires days of planning. Have we taken this, have we taken that and a half way through the ride we go about” omg! We missed this”, looking at what we’ve packed seemed to be like a mini vacation.

So how can we turn this to something that we enjoy doing, something that we look forward to, something that would become a tradition to celebrate or come on let’s give the lady of the house some rest from cooking.

This can be slowly done by taking your child once he/she is about 7-8 months, so that they get used to the environment, look out what it is like, what people do.

Toddler at restaurant

Let’s take a look at few tips and tricks.

1) Eating early

This is certainly the most important point that needs to be taken into consideration. Plan to have your meal a little earlier so that your home early. Your child might be past bedtime, but you definitely need to be out of the restaurant and halfway down when they start getting cranky.

2) Pack a bag with food for the kid

You may plan to take the usual meal your toddler takes or if you’re someone who doesn’t want to run around and feed in the restaurant you may as well pack some healthy snacks to keep your toddler busy. You might even order an extra portion of salad or boiled veggies if your toddler is already sued to such food.

3) Get to know the place

You can place the order and then take round about the restaurant to explore or say hi if they are any kids around of the same age. And if you find one you’re lucky.

4) Plan what you eat

IF the restaurant that you planned to go has an online menu, make sure you decide what to order and eat there beforehand and not study the menu when you are actually there. This saves time, count on me.

5) Carry distractions

If your toddler is old enough to color to may carry some crayons and sheets keep them engaged. Some restaurants if they are kid friendly do have this available themselves. Reserve a set of toys for trips like these. They must be something new and not what the kid usually plays with.

6) Feed the kid before

If possible feed the kids before you start, in that way they are full and will not be cranky when you get there.

7) Get the corner table

Try your best to be seated in one of the corners or in booths, in that way the kid has more room and can save you from embarrassment.

8) Keep cutlery out of reach

Most parents give the children cutlery to play with. This is one of the worst way of distracting. Keep them out of reach.

9) Opt for a kid friendly restaurant

Look in for restaurants which have a high chair, kids zone and most importantly kid friendly menu. Don’t attempt to feed whatever your order to your kid to say that you are making them get used to it. They have all the time in the world to explore food. Always introduce new foods at home, by which I mean home cooked and not take away food being fed at home.

10) avoid the junk as treat

Avoid treating your kid with junk. This might tempt them to ask for it, when they see people at the other table having it.

11) Keep clean

Always carry two sets of bib and your own play mat. After all, since we eat in the restaurant we do not pay them for the mess the child makes.

12) table manners if kids are old enough

If the kids are old enough, teach them table manners. Practice pretend play of a restaurant. They can learn to order what they would want to eat with a little assistance from your side.

13) Toilet trips before eating

Take your kids to toilet before you settle down to eat.

14)Prepare for restlessness.

It may be tough for your kid to keep unmoving for a long time – about 45 minutes is the max for a child up to about age 5. Be ready to take them on a walk outside the restaurant.

15) IF everything fails; leave

Try not to get angry if, after all your preparation, your child is troublesome. Instead, ask for the bill and take away boxes, and finish the meal at home.

“If you’re so busy correcting your child that you aren’t enjoying your meal, it’s time to do something else,” says Pamela Gould, author of Feeding the Kids.

Letter to my dear daughter #myfriendalexa

Dear Cheeni,

Even before I knew you were coming I named you, my little angel. I found a new reason for my existence when I saw those two pink lines. We (your Dad and I) fell in love within seconds listening to the magical sound of your heartbeat. I thought it was a myth to identify gender based on heart rate, but I knew it was you, my special rainbow baby.

I knew it from those constant kicks and strokes you gave me while you grew inside me. They were such a gift, a signal that you were alive and growing. The times I sing to you and read out to you when I was alone, I felt a strong connection. Those moments of acknowledgement when I talk to you, the signs of reciprocation kept me going even when I was tired or feeling low. Even today I try holding on to what it felt like to have you kicking and stretching the limbs of your tiny body inside my body, safe and sound. These are moments etched in memory for lifetime.

I wasn’t the only person counting down to your arrival. No words to express the excitement of your Grandparents (all four of them) and both aunts as I was nearing my due date. You see, you are their first grandchild and their first niece. The countless number of phone calls showing that they can’t stop talking about you, to see if it’s time. I really feel so blessed to see how many people love you.

I was so eager to be the mom you so deserve. Disclaimer: I may not get it right at first, but I promise to try my very best and I promise to love you unconditionally until my last breath on earth.

I celebrated my first Mother’s Day with you, my baby. I feel this irresistible need to tell you some things about what it means to me to be your mother. So exciting that I now have a girl of my own who will wish me “happy mother’s day”. Now that’s a change from me wishing my mom and all elder woman in family.

I replay the first moment I saw you, at times when I try sleeping at night. The first eye contact I had with you on the labor bed, when the nurse gave you to me, by placing you on my chest. That moment of relief, happiness, pain all at the same time.

And What about your Dad? You are so lucky to have him of course. I have never doubted his ability to make a fantastic father. And now I know you will be the girl(second) who ultimately melts his heart with just one look.

You’ve had such an intense impact on our existence here. And now, you will become the best and worst parts of us.

You have my eyes, and your dad’s hair, my round cheeks and his long fingers, but you are unique.

And destiny will tell us if you are as bold as him or as quiet as me. We have so much ahead of us.

You are a daddy’s daughter too but sometimes the feel that you’re all mine at least secretly gives me a sense of pride and accomplishment. He does travel along for the ride but you and me… We’ve got a special thing going.

There would be times where it gets tough, but I do know that we can get through tough times, and I want you to know that I’m always trying my best. I want to be a good mother and I’ll try my best to do what’s right for you.

All I would wish for you is to Create a life that gives YOU happiness. Nothing would make me prouder.

You will have plenty of days to thank me, but I would thank you on every Mother’s day for making me a mom and I am so happy to be yours.

I can strongly say there is no word in English language that sounds as delightful to a woman as the word, “Mom.” God must have coined it after a long thought. One shout out of the word “Mom!” — every woman turns her head. And that is how special it is to be a mother.

#sindhublogs

#myfriendalexa

I am taking my Alexa rank to the next level through Blogchatter .

Parenting Journey

Hello All,

Welcome to my world of blogging where I go about sharing my experiences as a new parent.

Motherhood has indeed made me a new person I discover each day.

I am a mother of a naughty beautiful toddler , Shrinika who makes me run on my toes all day. Wait..I’m a working mom so don’t take it literally. So it’s not all day and the times when I am with her.

Let me take you on a journey of good parenting through my experiences shared here. Feel free to let me know your comments, show some love and give me your suggestions and feedback. Happy parenting.