Losing a loved one can make your shatter like the sky coming down on you. Grieving is a natural response to loss, many of us fail to understand how it can affect lives.
The loss of a loved one can make irreparable damage to what we say the foundations of our lives. This damage is prone to affecting both the mins and body.
Preoccupied with thoughts, memories and images of the loved one, having difficulty in accepting the reality that they’re gone, waves of sadness and yearning about them is all part of the grieving process.
It’s been six months since my mom passed away, but i still find it difficult to come to terms that she’s gone. Waiting for her to open the door while I knock, checking on me if I had my meal not just once every meal of the day, checking if I’ve taken medicines, that tender love and care when I’m sick, those gossips during coffee, lying down on the lap, falling asleep on her shoulders during TV time is all something that I yearn for now.
I know that won’t happen now, but still my heart fails to accept and makes me ask the supreme ‘ please just one more time’. There are days I feel absolutely normal, and days I cry like a baby. Not just a metaphor I really do. Somedays I find it very difficult.
My sleep cycle has gone for a toss. Blame my photographic memory, not sure if it’s a boon or a bane, I keep getting visuals of mom’s last few days with me on repeat. Which makes me not shut my eyes. But there are days I fall asleep unknowingly.
I am still trying my best to deal with her loss. Began to focus on reading how to process grief and deal with it. I thought why not share it here, might help someone who is on the same phase like me.
Grief can be classified into acute and persistent grief.
The first six to twelve months after the loss of someone we experience acute grief.
If it lasts over 12 months, it is termed persistent grief.
Chronic stress is commonly experienced during acute grief, it can lead to a lot of physical and emotional issues like anger, anxiety, pains, sleep issues amd depression. But if the person is old these signs shouldn’t be ignored.
People with persistent grief need to take therapy or counselling to deal with it by taking up cognitive behavioral therapy. But for acute grief there are certain ways that can help you ease.
Take new responsibility
Losing a loved one will also lead to you taking up new responsibility. Say like cooking, households chores. This can probably add to your stress but can be a mood uplifted experience if you take it in a positive way. Focusing on task can help you divert from grief.
When you are under stress it acts as a trigger and makes you crave sugar and fat. Feel good, high calorie and high fat foods is what people reach out to make them feel better. But it can worsen your condition. Planning to take a well balanced diet will definitely help you maintain good health.
When you deal with grief your sleep cycles get affected. You might find it difficult to fall asleep, wake up a number of times and not having sound sleep. But following a sleep routine on a regular basis , avoiding screens close to bed time, avoiding caffeine and alcohol can help for a sound sleep.
Move your body
A daily walk can help in easing depression, agitation and sorrow related to grief. We find ourselves less motivated to go and workout. In that case a workout partner or a group ca help you sort this out.
Look after your health
Our general health gets ignored when we are going through grief. But dont take it lightly. Set reminders for any tests that you should be taking, tablets or medications. A little help from a family member to remind you doesn’t hurt.
Reach out to people
It’s most painful to see people and the outside world but also important to not miss the connections. This would serve as a reminder that you are not alone and when you feel isolated you have family and friends to help you out and be the supportive hand. Go out for a coffee, invite people for lunch. If not be in touch with someone over mail Or call.
Grief affects mental and physical health to a great extent. Reaching out to help and help make a betterment in your mental health is not something to feel shy or to be hesitant to ask of.
This post is part of Blogchatter’s CauseAChatter.”
This blog post is part of the blog challenge ‘Blogaberry Dazzle’ hosted by Cindy D’Silva andNoor Anand Chawla.’