Tag: my way of parenting

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How to raise an independent toddler ?

Not recently that I noticed my son stepping up for each and every thing mentioning that ‘i want to’ . Though he hasn’t started speaking fluently, the gibberish babble of saying and showing that he wants to do it by himself gave me a lot of thoughts.

Wanting to do everything what the adults do , including disciplining the sibling the way we do made me look at him in awe. Kids these days keep looking at you every second I say.

The desire to be independent is something that I found so adorable and at the same time exhausting as I was losing my cool very often. Though I do understand that it is our duty to raise self sufficient adults like we are.

At the same time it feels kind of scary when they take risks which I feel they are not ready yet. The mother instinct in me, one time wanted to let him try and on the other end getting tensed that don’t let him.

As a result, it did make the day longer and I knew that folding a cloth would now take ten minutes or even putting away the plate after eating.

The child’s independence is letting go of the stage in childhood. That is where realisation kicks in hard saying that they’re growing up and then there is. No going back.

So how do you encourage your toddler to be independent

Not holding them back

You always begin where you tend to hold them back, embrace their decision to do things on their own. Guide and coach then but do not hold them back and tell them there is a time to learn doing this.

This could start with them wearing shoes. Though it takes forever, I don’t think you should hurry up here. Your hands might itch to get there and get it done, but stay back and let them do it.

Show them, do together, monitor and leave them alone

Them wanting to do a task above comfort level can be scary. But what do you do when they insist on doing it.

Think whether it is age appropriate. Start by showing how it is done, proceed to doing it with them together, go ahead with monitoring when they do and help them if they get stuck and lastly let them try it alone.

You can start this by making them prepare their snack , making their bed or folding clothes.

Though the process is time consuming the end result it gives is your child being independent. It all starts with the kid watching when you do it and ends with them doing it on their own without needing your help.

Letting them do things their way

Micro management is something that nobody likes not even your toddler . You should not only embrace their decision to do things on their own but also do it in their own way.

All of us are different people in having our thinking process and our own preferences. Give them the freedom to do things their way rather than having them copy our style.

Do not help them in their struggle

Any mom doesn’t like their kid struggling. Nobody likes to see the disappointed look on their face it the anger that’s going to be building up after the failure.

When you attempt to help them it is going to be harmful for them in future. They come to a conclusion that we think they aren’t cut out for the tasks. They have the easy way to sense our doubts instead of our support in them.

In fact they wil learn much more when they fail than they learn when we step in and help them out. They also get the message that it’s okay to give up when something gets hard.

Nurture their independence letting them struggle. They will see the obstacles as challenges and find ways to come out of it.

Accomodating their independence

Having my daughter express her wish to help me in kitchen wasn’t the most efficient use of time. I realised that rather than being grateful that I’m having help ,I was more tensed if I will be able to finish cooking within the time.

But instead of saying no, I made a change. Rather than hurrying up the process , I made sure I had enough time before dinner preparation so that she could chip in and help me out.

In this way it can make them work on their own pace and keep us free from feeling the rush. You can also try this if they want to dress up themselves or pack their own lunch boxes.

We can avoid power struggles by not butt heading with them, during our routines and instead take into account their need for extra time they need to practice to do things on their own and in their own way.

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#BlogchatterA2Z P what to and what not to teach your toddler

Hello there people we’re almost there and this is the end of third week before we head for the Sunday break. Make sure you spend it wise and gear up for a new start next week. Let’s take a look at the traits in P.

What to teach

Patient – A person is termed as patient who accepts or tolerates delay. They are not easily annoyed or anxious. They remain calm.and bear any provocation.

Persistent – A person who continues firmly with an option or an action. They are determined to achieve their goals without any motivation. It gives them a lot of hope. Such people refuse to give up easily.

Punctual – A person is termed to be punctual when they perform things at agreed or proper time. Such people complete tasks before or at the appropriate time. It leads to a lot of achievement. Such people are well respected and are welcomed. It makes them reliable and a trustworthy person.

Passionate – A person is termed passionate when they have strong beliefs. They are more dedicated and strongly inclined towards what they want to pursue.

Persevering – A person is termed to be persevering if they continue with their action inspite of the delay or difficulty in achieving. They keep trying against all odds and obstacles. Such people are determined and are sure to succeed in whatever they do.

Practical – A person is termed to be practical of they are very much concerned about the actual execution rather than believing in theoretical approach. They take decisions based on logic rather than emotions.

What not to teach

Peevish – A person is termed as peevish when they are ill-tempered. They exhibit annoyance or bad mood very often.

Pernicious – A person is termed pernicious when their actions cause harm or hurt.

Pessimistic – A person is termed pessimistic when they always expect the worst turn over of events. They believe that bad things are more likely to happen.

Presumptuous– A person is termed presumptuous when act rudely due to over confidence. They are known to exhibit less respect by doing things they aren’t supposed to.

Let’s take a break tomorrow and see you all on Monday.

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#BlogchatterA2Z O what to and what not to teach your toddler

We’re almost into the end of third week, so let’s keep the momentum going.. Let’s take a look at traits in O before we head to the much nee

What to teach

Obedient – A person who is complying to an order. Such people do as they are told, follow instructions perfectly. Parents would be proud of their kids and kids would always stay out of trouble if they are obedient.

Observant – A person who is quick to notice things. They are known to pay a lot of attention and are usually alert. It’s a natural human instinct that’s helpful to make you competitive in this world. Such people have good control over their emotions and have a great ability to estimate and discriminate.

Optimistic – A person who is always hopeful and confident. They are always confident of favourable outcomes. Such people are usually self motivated and bring in a lot of positivity. They always look at the bright side of negative event.

Organized – A person who plans efficiently. Such people do things in a systematic manner. They plan systematic approaches to any problem they face.

Outgoing – A person is termed outgoing if they are usually casual and socially confident. They are usually friendly, warm and welcome in any gathering.

Outspoken – A person is termed outspoken, if they are confident of expressing their opinion. They are known to express their opinion directly or candidly.

What not to teach

Oddball – A person is termed oddball when they behave in a strange and an eccentric manner. They usually have unusual behaviour or habits.

Obsessive – A person is termed obsessive when people are very interested about something that they lose control over their feelings.

Obstinate – A person who is stubborn to change one’s opinion. They are so determined so as to not change the opinion they initially proposed.

Obstructionist – A person who constantly makes attempts to destroy an ongoing event. They make it difficult or impossible for the events to occur as planned.

Let’s meet again tomorrow with a new set of traits and until then if you think I missed out any please feel free to add them to comments.

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#BlogchatterA2Z N what to teach and what not to teach your toddler

Hello people hope you’re doing good and keeping yourself occupied working, managing home and the kids. More power and strength to all us and I’m sure we can get through this. Let’s see the traits in N which we would want to teach the kids and which we shouldn’t encourage.

What to teach

Neat – A person is termed neat when they are well-groomed and tidy. The person is usually cool and well liked by others.

Noble – A person who shows fine qualities and moral principles. Such people are usually known for their honesty and charity. They are usually not selfish and are well respected. Such people are always looked up to and welcomed.

Noteworthy– A person who deserves attention is called noteworthy. They do deeds that are worthy of noting.

What not to teach

Name dropper – A name dropper is someone who always uses famous personalities names to pretend that he/she knows about them just for the sake of impressing others. They are severely insecure about their own image and use this tactic to impress.

Nagging person – A person is termed to be nagging when he / she constantly harasses others to do something. They don’t ask them to do rather they just keep telling them to do it. They resort to annoying the other person telling them to do something , or keep complaining.

Narrow minded – A person is termed narrow minded when they are unwilling to listen and tolerate others views. Such people do not socialise well. They are always known for pinpointing. They are usually judgemental and are not open to new ideas.

Let’s meet again tomorrow for a new set of traits.

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#BlogchatterA2Z I what to and what not to teach your toddler

Let’s learn about what and what not to teach your toddler’s in the letter I.

What to teach

Idealist – A person who envisions an ideal world rather than the real world. Though they might sound impractical, they strive hard to attain the perfection to make the world a better place. It can make you pursue the best way rather than the real way to achieve the goal.

Imaginative – is a person who shows creativeness and inventive. A person who has an ability to develop a unique solution to a problem. Such people come up with good stories or songs.

Impartial – A person who is impartial treats everyone equally. They give a fairly equal solution rather than taking sides.

Ingenious – A person who is clever and intelligent. It cannot be deemed as higher level of intelligence but termed as clever. These people show an unusual aptitude for discovering.

Irritable – A person is termed irritable when their temper is easily disturbed. They can be easily annoyed or made angry.

Irresponsible – A person is termed irresponsible when he/ she does not show any sign of being responsible. They always forget to do what I is entrusted upon them .

Insecure – A person who is insecure would mean that someone who is not confident . They would not feel good about themselves and would rather feel sorry when others look at them.

Impatient– People who are impatient have the tendency to be easily annoyed and disturbed. They usually cannot tolerate any delay .

Let’s meet again tomorrow for a new set of traits.

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#BlogchatterA2Z H what to and what not to teach your toddler

We’re into the eighth alphabet. It’s just so quick we got to here. H has a lot of good attributes.

What to teach

Humble – Being humble is being modest of one’s importance. They believe they aren’t proud of better than people. They are usually observed go patient in actions and aren’t irritated with others action. They handle stress better and have high tolerance levels.

Hardworking – A person who is hardworking is someone puts in a lot of energy and effort to achieve something. Hardworking people are more dedicated, determined and disciplined.

Honest – Being honest is when someone is true to his words. They are sincere in their efforts. It is about being true to oneself and also to others. It can be taught not all of a sudden but gradually over a period of time.

Humanitarian – A person described as humanitarian is usually concerned about an improvement in human welfare. They focus on protecting human dignity.

Helpful – A person is termed helpful when they are always ready to offer assistance. They are ready to help others and do not think over the results but mainly focus on helping.

What not to teach

Hysteric – Being hysterical is when someone has uncontrollable temper. It is a state of extreme fear and anxiety.

Hypocrite – A person who has certain beliefs and feelings when they actually don’t.

Hardmouthed – A person who is hard mouthed is someone who is stubborn. They don’t respond to you in a satisfactory way. They are usually characterised by rigid behaviour.

Haphazard – Would mean not doing things in an orderly fashion. Person doing things in a haphazard manner is usually not in good books. They don’t have a plan and do things in a random fashion.

Hasty – A person described as hasty always does things in a hurried manner. They make quick decisions without giving much thought and insufficient consideration.

Heartless – A person is described as heartless when they have complete lack of empathy or consideration to human feelings. It is one of the terrible attitudes one could develop as a human.

Let’s meet tomorrow for traits in I.

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#BlogchatterA2Z F – What to and what not to teach your toddler

Let’s learn about the F words that we should teach and the ones we shouldn’t. No wide eyes or raised eyebrows. I’m talking about the characteristic traits we should be teaching our toddlers.

What should you teach

Faithful – A person who is faithful is normally described as someone whom you can rely upon. Somebody who is true to their promises and their word . They keep up to what they say.

Fearless – fearless would mean lack of fear. It’s the inner feeling that makes you take one more step when you fall down. That feeling of not getting dejected after falling and makes you want to try.

Flexible – Being flexible is not being rigid or stubborn but would be a person who can accept changes.

Forgiving – Forgiving is when someone is ready and willing to forego ones mistake. It helps us grow as an individual and it’s best for us not to hold on to bigger experience, anger, hurt.

Forthright – Being forthright is a person when being direct spoken and being Frank. The person is not shy to speak out what they actually mean.

Forward looking – is the person who thinks of future opportunities or development. Somebody who is courageous and bold enough to take decisions in lieu of future opportunities.

What not to teach

Faint hearted – faint hearted is someone who is fearful and afraid. This person could be easily scared and is usually timid natured. They aren’t brave and would venture unnecessary risks.

Fallacious – This would be talking based in less known information or something based on no logic. A false conclusion that is being conveyed based on improper information.

Fussy – Someone who is hard to please and has too many needs or requirements even for small things. They demand too much attention , worry about unnecessary things and complains a lot.

Let’s meet tomorrow for what we learn in G.

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#BlogchatterA2Z E – What to and what not to teach your toddler

Happy Monday folks .. Today we look at the list of traits we teach in the fifth alphabet E and what not to teach.

What to teach?

Earnest – Being an Ernest person would mean your sincere about what you choose to do. The actions that come from them are sincere and would definitely mean that they mean serious business. This cannot be confused with honesty wherein that means being truthful.

Easy going – Bring up your toddler as someone who is relaxed and doesn’t get stressed easily. They should be taught to control temper , be calm and take things in a flow. It’s a desirable quality and a person with such a trait is always happy with what they have.

Ebullient – A person is termed this way when he / she bubbles with energy or enthusiasm. Such a person is so very cheerful that they’re always welcome as company.

Empathetic – Bring them up as someone whose is empathetic and can understand the feelings of other human beings. Empathy is not something that is inborn it has to be taught. This is a very crucial trait to decide if you’re a good person.

Extrovert – A social outgoing person or somebody who is full of energy when surrounded by people is termed an extrovert. Extroverts can adapt easily in new environments since they have an upper hand when it comes to socializing.

What not to teach

Egocentric – Could also be termed as self centered. Such a personality has no regard to others feelings and is only concerned about self. Such a person always has a belief that they would be the center of attention. It normally comes out as acts of selfishness, lack of sympathy towards others.

Emotionalist – a person who gives most importance to feelings and emotions rather than reasoning. Such a person would never agree to logical thinking upon arriving to solutions but would rather think more about the emotional consequences.

Envious – Would mean a discontent in not having what others have or they could do. It causes unhappiness and makes you feel inferior.

Exaggerator – A person who tends to blow incidents out of proportions. They usually have the tendency of describing events more than what actually had occurred.

Exhibitionist – A personality who tends toward steal attention by behaving in a certain way even it may seem silly. The person with this trait normally is know to boast of their abilities.

Let’s meet again tomorrow for the F words .

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#BlogchatterA2Z D what to and what not to teach

We’re into the fourth alphabet D for which is like to mention qualities like dedicated, dependable, determined, decisive, delightful and a dreamer to be taught and practiced.

What to teach

Dedicated – Being dedicated would mean complete involvement in an action. To succeed in any task the first and foremost thing would be the dedication. The willingness that comes from within to spend the time and energy into something is what is termed dedication.

Dependable – Being dependable is being a person on whom we can be sure of or be confident of. This makes you a person on whom we could count on or rely upon. That level of confidence that forms a personality trait is being dependable.

Determined – Being determined is having a strong feeling to complete or succeed in a task. It is a feeling that will not allow anyone or anything to stop you from doing it. The firmness in resolution gives you that drive towards completion.

Decisive – Being decisive would mean the ability to decide and come to a conclusion. It is based on this trait you continue to accomplish the plan to proceed with the task. It doesn’t mean that you decide things in a hurry. It means you have enough knowledge on what you decide to proceed further on.

Delightful – This would mean becoming a liking for all. A character that would be loved and greatly appreciated and look forward to. It is that when someone describes you as delightful it means you bring in happiness or joy to the surroundings.

Dreamer – Being a dreamer would deem you a person who always imagines things you would like to happen but is impractical. But in my point of view if your aren’t a dreamer, you wouldn’t be a doer. It is dreams that often give you suggestions or solutions to existing problems in life.

What not to teach

Deceptive – Being deceptive would mean giving a false impression. You would not want your kid to be a person who makes you believe that something that is not true. You see them building up excuses for their mistake however believable that might be, cut it out right away.

Dishonest – As we know this is a characteristic of a person who cannot be trusted. We obviously do not want our kids to be this way. Make them act fair right from the beginning.

Domineering – Domineering would mean gain control of the situation in an inappropriate way. People with this characteristic try to thrust what they decide without having empathy. They feel they decide everything and that’s the end of it.

Despondent– Being despondent is having a low feeling or losing hope . It’s something like losing confidence or getting into depression.

That’s it with D and see you next week for fresh start with what you should be teaching in E and what not to . Until then have a great weekend.

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#BlogchatterA2Z C what to and what not to teach

The third alphabet usually taught as c for cat, cake or cup for the kid. For us we would teach them to be cheerful, compassionate, confident, courageous and charismatic. What should we not teach would be cunning, choosey and childish.

What to teach

Cheerful – Being cheerful would mean being chirpy energetic. Somebody who brings joy and happiness would always be welcomed to any surrounding or gathering. Such a person is always someone who everybody looks forward to .

Compassionate – Would mean someone who would empathize and be kind to others. A child should learn to think before they act and know the possibility if their actions would hurt someone. The child should be kind to all. A compassionate person is someone who could alleviate somebody else’s stress. If you want to lead a happy life or your child to lead a happy life teach them to be compassionate.

Confident – Being confident means being firm and absolutely right about what one wants to do. Being confident can make a kid sure of their abilities and their views and perceptions.

Courageous – Courage does not attribute only to physical bravery. It makes a person stand up against all odds without any fear. Nobody is born courageous it take practice.

Charismatic – A person who is charismatic helps others that feel the confidence in addition to the self. They bubble with confidence and that’s something that’s not egoistic.

What not to teach

Cunning – A person who is cunning is clever but usually unacceptable since the way of approach was dishonest. The person is very much capable of manipulating others thoughts to get what they want.

Choosey – A kid should be taught to accept whatever he /she gets and not be choosey for each and every thing offered. This in other words is easier if the kid is able to adapt well to what they are being offered.

Childish Being childish means immature and ignorant act. Crying to achieve what they want, blaming others are some of the actions a childish person does. We must teach them not to cry over small things.

So you now know what to and what not to teach in C. See you tomorrow for D.